The Mental Prison - Learned Helplessness

Well, it appears that my life is about being trapped inside of a mental prison that I've constructed by myself in order to feel safe inside of my comfort zone.  I am like a chained elephant in a zoo.  At first, the elephant is wild and rampant when captured.  After being locked up and caged for a while, the elephant just gets tired of trying to escape.  Eventually, the elephant just stops giving a f*ck and accepts his fate.  What you are witnessing unfolding is "learned helplessness".  In many ways I've fallen into this victimization tactic.  Like a lot of people, I face a lot of adversity and challenges as well as the typical naysayer who hides behind every corner saying that you can't do this or you can't do that.  Because there are so many challenges and conflicting personalities in life, it's not easy for any individual to be successful.  Like any of us haven't ever heard of a "Negative Nancy" or "Debby Downer"?  Or how about the everyday internet troll?  There's just far too many assh*les out there.

Do you want to be stuck making $0?  Does success cause pain and suffering to some of these negative types?  Why so much hate?  Well, here's your $0 pay cut. Congratulations you've won the game of accomplishing and achieving absolutely nothing!

. . . Am I the living embodiment of all these negative personality traits?  Is this why I've been generating $0 with my online presence?

The ball is in my court.  I have taken the responsibility of not being successful.  It's my decision to not put in the work to whatever to generate an income stream.  For example, I have decided to use my time to not put money into marketing my stuff, to not post every single day/week, to not upload YouTube videos, to not continue to make creative content, to not keep networking, to not care about my audience, to not care about my customers, to not care about my reviewers, to not care about my critics, and most important of all to not give an actual f*ck.  As a result, my income stream has continually been $0 from my online presence.  I admit I was given ample amounts of free time but have chosen not to pursue a money making schematic.  It's just not something a would naturally due unless there was an absolute way of making money from it.  Should I be posting more?  Should I continue to post YouTube videos?  The answer is YES.  I would like to share with the world my collective experiences, knowledge, and wisdom.  There is always something that can be learned by someone even if it's something what you shouldn't do.  

Do I dare to change my ways?  Will I ever break out of my chains?  Will I just start creating and posting more YouTube content of my own one day?  Will my blog ever reach more than 1 view?  Will I even break $10 with Google AdSense?  My God, I visited the Google office in New York around 2010.  Jesus Christ, I still haven't even made $10!?  I am responsible for this catastrophe.  I deserve what I've earned: $0.  I have all these complaints about other people, but in the end it's me taking home $0 dollars.  This is what happens when you don't know what you want in life.  This is what happens when you don't set boundaries and boarders around yourself.  This is what happens when you don't tell other people "No".  Making $0 is exactly what will happen to you if you follow my footsteps.  I am not living the life I want.  I am a cautionary tale as to what not to do.  If you think marketing isn't important, if you aren't consistent posting, if you don't like creating content, if you're lazy, if you don't like editing, if you don't like planning out things, or if you're just plan on not giving a f*ck don't expect to be making much money out of it.  In fact, I'll just save you a lot of time and just give you that $0 you deserve right now.

You must be questioning what I've been doing with my time then?  How do I survive?  Well, I've been interning at the hospital for 8 hours a day doing cat scans.  I've also been helping a family member in need of healing after a bad car accident.  It's true I don't make money with Google Adsense from blogging or YouTube, but I have been making money in real life jobs and stuff.  Like most people, I've been running the rat race, paying taxes, and being a typical average person.  I don't feel like it's really necessary to be posting about these things that are just kind of typical and average to the general population.  It maybe exciting for someone to see who lives overseas.  None the less, I just don't feel like I care enough to be taking action and initiative.  One day, I plan to go back to creating and/or posting/editing clips for my YouTube channel.       

Thank you for dropping by and reading my content.  Hopefully, I will come back some time and give it another whirl.